Yeah. whatever

Today was mostly good. my laptop got fixed by both me and daddy, though mostly daddy, little bit down in the dumps, but whatever, since I'm pretty sure ya'll are sick of my whining. And since no one listened to the last post at all, or I would bet a large amount of money they did if it wasn't Nina, I'll just drop that subject too.
On a completely different note, has anyone ever felt like they have this huge THING inside of them, and every time it rears it's ugly head we feel horrible? Yeah, for me, that thing's my temper. I've seen it before, I've seen that part of me before, and it's ugly as hell, and terrifies me. I've been painted the monster before because I couldn't keep in control, and I don't want it to happen again, not now, not ever, not even if it could save my life. I refuse to be a monster to people, and be called a bully by my own friends. And if you stupid people, or you people who care too much about someone as nutsy as me, think I need therapy, or anger management I DO NOT. I will NOT do any kinds of therapy. I intend to do this on my own. So whatever. I'm sure you people have better things to do then listen to insufferable whineiness so go have a nice day. Play outside while it's a good tempature before all the 'squiteers (mosquitos) come out.
----Caustic Sarcasm
Something has been taken, from deep inside of me, a secret I've kept locked away, no one can ever see. Wounds so deep they never close, they never go away, like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played. (If I could change I would, take up the pain I would, retrace every wrong move that I made I would, if I could stand up and take the blame I would, If I could take all my shame to the grave I would) It's easier to run, replacing this pain with all numb, it's so much easier to run, replacing all this pain. Just washing it aside, all of the helplessness inside, pretending I don't feel this way, it's so much easier then change. It's easier to run, replacing this pain with something numb, it's so much easier to run, then face all this pain, you're all alone.